Shannon Cutts

Day 118: Cockatiel Discovers Mystery Muffin

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When your reputation as .007, pint-sized super spy, precedes you, you can count on getting called in to consult on some pretty strange cases.

Since every one of these cases is unique, often you have no precedent to refer to – just your own gut instinct to guide your recommendations.

This also applies to the other professionals you will be working with….whether they happen to be acting professional or not.

But you wouldn’t be .007 (or the famous and feathery actor who often portrays him, anyway) if you didn’t have the kind of instincts that regularly make news headlines.

Speaking of which, Love & Feathers & Shells is oh-so-proud to introduce the fabulous and feathery actor Pearl Cutts in his latest one-avian play:

“Mystery Muffin”

It no longer surprises the security staff and ushers when the fans show up dressed in the theme of the latest play. 

Unfortunately, the fans’ large, round muffin costumes keep bumping up against each other, creating even more than the usual havoc as the line for tickets continues to grow longer.

Soon, the overall roundness of the costumes leads to squabbles about who was really in line before who else, causing somewhat of a domino effect as first one and then another muffin-attired fan goes down, toppling the others standing in line just behind them. 

The paparazzi can’t get enough of this, of course, and even those fans who aren’t involved in the skirmish begin fainting from all the excitement. Happily, this thins the line down to manageable levels by the time the doors actually swing open.

So this is the “mystery muffin,” eh? Definitely a “strong and silent type,” I would say.
Well, no, “Mom,” I can’t say I’ve seen one of this exact species before. At least it seems docile enough. Yes, you should write all that down for the case files – just like I showed you last time (and the time before that and the time before that….).
In fact, that is a good place to begin – by taking my trademarked “docility reading.” Yes, create a new headline in the case file titled “Docility Reading.”
Hey, you – Muffin – how docile are you on a scale from 1 to 10?
You say you are both docile and delicious? Well, that requires a second reading. Yes, “Mom,” make a second healing with the title “Deliciousness Reading.”
Okay, I have done my official test and the muffin scores high in both “docility” and “deliciousness.” Yes, you should write all that down, too.
A beakograph to verify your case file notes? Yes, I can take care of that as soon as Muffin here and I finish discussing the finer points of my contractually stipulated snack break.

As the curtain closes, small brown fragments begin to fling out from under the curtain hem. Even after much speculation, no one is quite sure what they are or how they got there.

The End.

Pearl, Malti, Bruce & Shannon

4 comments

    • Boy you said it! If ever there is a parrot hiding anywhere all it takes is a muffin to flush them out;)

      Reply

  2. “Soon, the overall roundness of the costumes leads to squabbles about who was really in line before who else, causing somewhat of a domino effect as first one and then another muffin-attired fan goes down, toppling the others standing in line just behind them.

    Not something to read with a mouth full of coffee! What a mind picture!

    Reply

    • Haha – good point! Never a dull moment when a certain feathered celeb makes an appearance 😉

      Reply

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