Thursday Thriller: Pearl Cutts in “The Remotest Remote”

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Being a famous and feathery actor requires an expert command of language.

Plus, you must be able to emote (express emotion) on demand.

And you must have a sufficiently charismatic on-stage personality to take command of the stage and capture the audience’s full attention.

This, of course, is why all the best master actors have feathers. But that doesn’t stop other wannabes (like, for instance, the stage “props” assigned to assist you with a particular role) from trying their best to steal your spotlight.

Love & Feathers is proud to present the world-famous and feathery actor Pearl Cutts in his latest one-avian play:

“The Remotest Remote”

As ticket holders enter the theater, they see the stage is already populated with three “props.” 

Each of the props has an odd series of small raised objects on their top surface. They are lying very still. They don’t seem very charismatic.

After some time, the lights dim and the star leisurely strolls on stage (the dimming is a new strategy to reduce fan fainting. It works….sort of).

Okay, let’s have some introductions. You – the grey one – you go first.
Your name is “Remote?” That’s not very catchy.
Your name is “Remoter Remote?” Sheesh. Seriously? Okay, and you – the one over there at the end of the line?
What’s that, Grandpa? Well, he says his name is “Remotest Remote.” If you can believe that. And he mentioned something about something he called “batteries?”
Well, see here now, don’t be asking my Grandpa about your alleged missing “batteries.” Clearly you and Remotest Remote over there – if that is even your real names – lost track of these “batteries” while wrangling them and you don’t want your handler to find out.
Would you look at the time! It is time for my contractually stipulated “waffle break.” Good luck with your “batteries” – clearly you need it.

With this, the star gives the “high sign” to his Grandpa, aka the Tall Tree, who offers a branch to his pint-sized partner. 

They head off in search toasted waffles. The three remotes continue lying there very un-charismatically.

Later, the news headlines report that several “batteries” are known to be on the lam in the local vicinity. Any civilian tips as to their whereabouts are eagerly sought.

The. End.

GreenHeart

Shannon & Pearl

Watch & Listen: Pearl & his mommy read from “Love & Feathers”

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Published by Shannon Cutts

Cockatiel, redfoot tortoise and box turtle mama. Author, writer, pet & people blogger.

2 thoughts on “Thursday Thriller: Pearl Cutts in “The Remotest Remote”

  1. You can tell Pearl is a star because he knows nothing can outshine him so he doesn’t try to taste test his props. My flock in training don’t have Pearl’s confidence and star power, so they always end up attempting to eat the small raised objects on their props.

Send Pearl, Malti & Bruce a message. :-)

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