Thursday Thriller: Pearl Cutts in “Who Is Gluten?”

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Some top secret agents are so top secret that no one is sure if they are real or just the stuff of legend.

Let’s say, for example, that you are .007, pint-sized super spy. Other spies want to meet you to learn all your secrets. Bad guys want to meet you to get bragging rights when they take you down.

And paparazzi wants to meet you so they can have their picture taken with you and prove that you are real (and then write a high-priced “tell all” memoir that gets made into an even higher-priced big-budget blockbuster movie starring their favorite feathery actor!).

Love & Feathers is proud to present the world-famous and feathery actor Pearl Cutts in his latest one-avian play:

“Who Is Gluten?”

When the box office officially opens for the new one-avian play, the queue is so long and rowdy the theater hires extra security. 

It is clear this is no ordinary event. Rumors are flying that, due to the subject matter, .007 himself might actually appear!

Hello. I was told you are here to audition for my contractually stipulated “snack break.” And your name is?
“Gluten Free Pancake?” That’s not a name. Which one of those is your name?
All three of those are your name? Look, I count three individuals waiting to audition. I will audition you individually. So I only need one name at a time. Let’s start with you – what is your name?
You can’t expect me to believe all three of you are named “Gluten Free Pancake.” Sheesh. I didn’t think I was going to need to call in .007 just to audition a new snack.

(At the mention of the mysterious .007, all three beings begin to visibly tremble. The audience is on the edge of their seats. They are waiting….watching….)

Look, Gluten. Or Free. Or Pancake. Or whatever your name is. As a matter of fact, .007 is a friend of mine. And he’s taught me a thing or two about uncooperative beings and how to handle them…..

All of a sudden the theater ushers begin to hurry towards the backstage area. The mysterious being the star calls “Mom” rushes out onstage and extends a finger – her feathery charge hops up and they hurry off stage again. 

The curtain closes and the fans are left to wonder….who is Gluten? And what connection does he have to .007?

The End.


Shannon & Pearl

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Published by Shannon Cutts

Animal sensitive and intuitive with Animal Love Languages. Parrot and tortoise mama. Dachshund auntie.

2 thoughts on “Thursday Thriller: Pearl Cutts in “Who Is Gluten?”

  1. My husband and I have been gluten-free for about 3 years now. Finding the perfect GF pancake was like a hunt for the holy grail, especially after I stopped eating dairy and eggs 4 months ago. I found the perfect “buttermilk” pancake recipe in Pure Delicious by Heather Christo. Even my picky GF but full-dairy and egg-eating husband loves them. Pearl might like them too!

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