Day 187: Cockatiel Claims Best Seat in the House

Follow Pearl, Malti & Bruce

Never miss a daily adventure!

Join 2,451 other subscribers

It is a well-known fact that hiring a large featherless assistant comes with both “pros” and “cons.”

On the “pros” side, you get catered meals, unlimited neck feather scratches, slavish devotion and even your own blog.

On the “cons” side – the large featherless beings know nothing (zero, zilch, squat) about personal space.

Even if everything – absolutely everything – about your relative demeanor, body language, and highly evolved non-verbal communication skills says “this seat’s taken,” guess who will still want to come over and sit down right. beside. you.

Oh yes.

Seriously, Mom? What about my highly advanced non-verbal communication skills says “please come crowd my space?”

As you get better at figuring out what sorts of training commands your assistant is most likely to respond to, you may try all sorts of strategies to gain a little breathing room.

Take napping, for instance.

Nothing says “this seat’s taken and I am oh-so tired and need to be left alone” like actually closing your eyes while you are roosting on your chosen seat.

Of course, even the most time-honored strategies are not guaranteed to work. If there is one strategy you want to stay away from, however, it is “cuteness.” That one will backfire each and every time.

Shoot. I knew I shouldn’t have tried to use “cuteness.” I think she’s actually coming closer now.

As a last resort, you can try enforcing ownership. One good way is to post your (fetching, feathery) photograph right on your seating area.

If I stare very hard and long at my fetching and feathery photograph, maybe she will finally take a hint.

When all else fails, and it is clear the whole idea of “personal space” is a figment of your imagination, just go back to focusing on the “pros” and remembering why you ever decided to hire a large featherless personal assistant.

Waffles. Loads and loads of your grandmother’s waffles.

Send Pearl your messages in the box below! <3

2 comments

  1. But Pearl, when you are adorable even when you aren’t trying for cuteness, it is impossible to stay away! Think if yourself as a big magnet we large featherless beings are helpless to resist.

Send Pearl, Malti & Bruce a message! :-)