Day 290: English Muffin Gone Rogue

For beings who routinely stalk and kill their prey in group settings, every new meal introduces some level of potential social risk.

As an example, let’s say you’ve been invited to dine at a neighboring flock’s home.

You arrive, view the spread, spy your chosen prey, and proceed to begin stalking.

Here, you are hoping for a best-case scenario – your prey dies quickly and politely, permitting you to continue to dine and chat without any awkward pauses.

Worst-case scenario, of course, is that your prey decides it isn’t in the mood to be digested that day and proceeds to put up a fight.

This prey looks tender and tasty. I’ll go ahead and quickly stalk and kill it so I can socialize.
Let me just explain to you how this is going to go.
Okay, let me just explain to you how this is going to go.
First I will take a small bite, just to let the other guests know I've claimed you. That is your cue to politely lay down and die.
First I will stake my claim with a small bite. Then you will politely lay down and die.
What do you mean you don't feel like being stalked today?
What do you mean you don’t feel like being stalked and killed today?
That wasn't stalked - I'll show you stalked.
That wasn’t stalked – I’ll show you stalked.
Feeling dead yet?
Feeling dead yet?
How about now?
How about now?
Sorry, Mom - I'll try to choose a less feisty lunch next time.
Sorry, Mom – I know that got a bit socially awkward. But look how dead it is now!

Author: Shannon Cutts
Co-Author: Pearl Cutts

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