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Day 309: The Nose Plant

In general (and regardless of what species you are) the “face plant” is an experience you most likely want to do your best to avoid.

Luckily, the same does not hold true for the face plant’s much classier cousin, the “nose plant.”

This little-known expert maneuver is one only a few elite gourmands worldwide can successfully perform.

For starters, you need to have the kind of facial configuration that lends itself to an “all in one” dining experience.

(In other words, over time and with close observation, you have realized there is a reason why your large featherless assistant first sniffs the wine and then samples it. Whether sipped from bottle or glass, clearly only one of her awkward orifices at a time will fit through such a narrow opening. )

But when you have a seamlessly contoured facial configuration that permits more flexibility, you may be one of the lucky few who can sniff AND savor at the same time.

Oh boy oh boy. An unattended gourmet morsel. It must be for me.
Oh boy oh boy. An unattended gourmet morsel. It must be for me.
This seems the perfect dish for a maneuver only a few elite beings (with feathers) can pull off.
In fact, this dish appears tailor-made for my signature dining maneuver, the “nose plant.”
Let me just do a quick cross-check and depth test.
Let me just do a quick cross-check and depth test. Yup – this looks perfect.
Ready.....
Ready…..
Set.....
Set…..
Here goes!
Go!

Author: Shannon Cutts
Co-Author: Pearl Cutts

 

 

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