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Day 308: More Food Bowl Basics

Yesterday’s class on “Food Bowl Basics” covered the fundamentals of repelling mealtime moochers.

However, since beings with feathers typically get offered the choicest portions of any dish, there are times a moocher may become so persistent secondary protocols are required.

(NOTE TO STUDENTS: This is an advanced course – these tactics are highly classified and only students who can demonstrate total mastery of the fundamentals will be permitted to enroll. All approved attendees will be required to sign a confidentiality agreement. This agreement is also classified.)

When your food bowl is under siege from moochers, you can use it as a decoy while you dine in a more secure location.
When your food bowl is under siege from a moocher, you can use it as a decoy while you retreat to dine in a more secure location.
While the moocher sniffs around your (empty) decoy bowl, you can dine from the source, selecting individual morsels to display so the moocher thinks you don't have much dinner.
While the moocher sniffs around your (empty) nearby decoy bowl, you can dine from a higher shallow emergency “shelf bowl,” selecting individual morsels to display so the moocher thinks you don’t have much dinner.
As you dine in your shallow emergency "shelf bowl," always keep one eye on the dish and one eye on the decoy bowl.
As you continue to dine from your emergency “shelf bowl,” always keep one eye on the dish and one eye on the decoy bowl (so the moocher thinks you still want it and won’t get suspicious).
By using the highly classified "dip and dine" method, you can extract small servings and the moocher will be none the wiser.
By using the highly classified “dip and dine” method, you can extract small servings and the moocher will be none the wiser.
Throughout, you want to always display "fierceness" so the moocher will be too afraid to come any closer.
Throughout, you want to always display “fierceness” so the moocher will be too afraid to breach the perimeter and challenge you for dining privileges.

Author: Shannon Cutts
Co-Author: Pearl Cutts

2 thoughts on “Day 308: More Food Bowl Basics

  1. Oh wow! That was truly impressive. Charlie and Chloe will have to study this a few more times before trying to emulate Pearl’s prowess!

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