Category Archives: Pearl

Every being has preferences. For instance, when you have no feathers, you might prefer a computer keyboard that is free from cockatiel poop. (Weird, but there you have it.) And if you have feathers, you might prefer never to encounter a Q-tip. Q-tips are what your mom uses to swab your left wing when you’veContinueContinue reading “Day 183: Death to Q-tips”

I only just recently got a chance to watch “Parrot Confidential,” a PBS expose on the life of captive parrots. But I had already been hearing about the program for many months, all the while awaiting my opportunity to view it with equal parts eagerness and trepidation. I say this because, as a (slavishly) devotedContinueContinue reading “PBS: Parrot Confidential”

Little kids enjoy playing a game called “King of the Mountain.” They think it is fun to scamper up a hill and fight off marauders so they can claim the hill for their very own. What is even more fun, however, is to play a new and improved game called “King of the Cage.” WhileContinueContinue reading “Day 182: King of the Cage”

The large featherless beings have many strange customs and rituals, but one of the strangest is their obsession with bellies that have feathers. The moment your large featherless assistant sees yours, she just has to kiss it. Over and over and over and over and over again. One minute you are just innocently sitting there….ContinueContinue reading “Day 181: Belly Kisses”

Being small and feathery gives you many natural gifts – including leadership abilities. In a group, others instinctively look to you for guidance. Just the way you present and conduct yourself gives you natural authority. And when there is a clear lack of organization and focus, you know just how to herd everyone back inContinueContinue reading “Day 180: Herding”

When you are little and have feathers (and have always been little and have always had feathers) you tend to look like “prey” to, well, nearly everything. In this case, it just makes sense to hire a large featherless bodyguard. Being neither small nor cute, and not having any feathers at all (poor dears), theContinueContinue reading “Day 179: Bodyguard”

When you have feathers, your official motto is: “Anything the large featherless being can do, I can do better.” Let’s take typing, for example. You’ve noticed the large featherless being spends hours and hours sitting in front of the rectangular glowing thing, moving her fingers over the smaller set of tasty white squares. She calls this “typing.”ContinueContinue reading “Day 178: Typing”

From time to time the large featherless being will go out for awhile. When she returns, sometimes she is carrying bags. Occasionally one of these bags contains a new addition to the household that appears to have…..feathers. Although these new additions are nearly always impostors, only the most highly trained and discerning appraisers can tell the real fromContinueContinue reading “Day 177: Antiques (Avian) Road Show”

Sometimes the large featherless chef fixes a particularly delicious dish. It is crunchy on the corners and soft in the center. But she likes the dish so much she tends to quickly consume an entire plate with no thought for setting aside your portion. Which means – of course – that you must quickly distractContinueContinue reading “Day 176: Nachos”

When you have feathers, a sharp curved beak, powerful wings and claws, and proven survival skills, new adversaries often like to challenge you. While you can of course turn these challenges down, if your adversary looks particular weak (or tasty) it can be good for PR to accept a challenge now and again. But before the challenge begins, itContinueContinue reading “Day 175: Bag Wars”